My first time presenting to a meaningful audience happened within my first year at IBM. I had joined the company right out of college, so I was still young and, well, unseasoned. I didn’t really know what I was doing except trying to explain concepts.

I learned two important lessons that day. One, you don’t always know what you think you know until you have to explain it to someone else, or in this case, to a bunch of someone elses. Two, it’s critical to know who those someone elses are when you are presenting; in other words, who is your audience.

It’s also critical to know all of this before you present. I’ll get to that, but first, let’s take a closer look at each of these lessons.

Knowing what you think you know. In my experience, there are three tiers of knowing.

1. You think you know what you are talking about. This is delusional, because in your own mind, you are convinced you completely understand a concept, or completely enough that you can discuss it cogently whenever the time arises. Except, you don’t.

2. You know what you are talking about, and can hold an intelligent conversation with others who already have a bit of an understanding of what you are talking about. This tier is also a bit delusional because while you have hold of a concept, it’s still not a solid grasp.

3. You have a firm grasp on the concept, can converse about it intelligently, garner some insight, and most importantly, explain it fully to someone else who doesn’t have a clue. This is the tier of understanding you must posses when you present.

Identify your audience. As you have seen, it’s imperative that you identify your audience. Understand whether you are presenting to an audience of decision makers or information gatherers, or both. Address each group as most appropriate to better attain your objective.

Three audience categories. Your audience can also fall into three categories: primary, secondary, and hidden. You’ve probably heard this before. Still, I’d like to describe each category.

1. Your primary audience encompasses the people that are physically present in the room. These are the people who can immediately fulfill your goals. Address your entire presentation directly to them.

2. A secondary audience is people not in attendance, but are directly related to, and have an interest in, your primary audience. This secondary audience will look upon your presentation from some distance, but nonetheless will be interested in what you have to say. More than likely, your primary audience will consult with your secondary audience who, in turn, can influence your primary audience’s decisions and thought
processes.

3. Your hidden audience encompasses people who want to be aware of your presentation on a peripheral level. This audience can include any number of people for both personal and professional reasons. Your hidden audience also has the opportunity to hold sway over your primary and secondary audiences.

How to address your audiences. Focus your presentation on your primary audience, while being aware that your secondary and hidden audiences are also interested and, at some level, are listening.

Address your comments during the presentation as if all three audience groups are present. Chances are good that those in attendance—your primary audience—will talk to members of the secondary and hidden audiences. Your presentation is the time to frame their comments so that you can control the information that gets passed along.

My first presentation. So, in what manner did those two lessons enlighten me during my long ago, first business presentation? In a word, painfully. Here’s what happened.

My astute manager, Janie, asked me to present the concepts of the book I was writing at that time (about the marvels of virtual storage management). Because she already knew lesson one, she first had me present informally to the members of our small (12-person) group. That’s when I gained my understanding of lesson one.

Next, she had me present to an audience of three dozen people, none of whom I knew. I assumed these people were my only audience. Except, a secondary and hidden audience was evaluating not only my ability to explain cogently, but also my potential to become a professional worthy of the company’s attention. That was indeed eye-opening!

How to proceed. While this conclusion is obvious, it still bears summarizing. Before giving any presentation, make sure you can explain what you know to an unknowing audience, and also make sure you know to whom you are presenting and what you want them to do with the information you impart. This can only bring you closer toward a human connection with your audience.

—Rich Maggiani

“Wow! Now I understand why it’s so difficult to become a good presenter,” gushed one of my students in a recent class I conducted on presentation skills. I had just put up a slide that, one by one, enumerated 28 qualities that every good presenter not only exhibits, but also embodies. These qualities seem to flow effortlessly from skillful presenters.

To become a skillful presenter, you must embody them too.

Twenty-eight qualities. Outstanding presenters continually pursue these qualities. Here they are, listed alphabetically accompanied by a brief descriptions of each quality. Because it might be easier to understand a quality by knowing its opposite, I’ve listed those too. You can see how diametrically opposed these qualities can be.

One last point. Try to visualize each of these qualities to get a better idea of how to exhibit them.

1. Adept nonverbally: clear communication with body language. Your nonverbal communication—body movements, gestures, posture, and facial expressions—speak louder than your words. Opposite: stilted.

2. Adept verbally: full speaking command; uses great words. Your verbal communication—the way you speak—can carry an audience: your tone, inflection, and volume, and how you pace, pause, and enunciate. Opposite: speechified (in other words, as if you are reading a written speech—for the first time. Yikes, how boring!)

3. Animated: full of life and excitement. Act alive! Opposite: lethargic.

4. Assertive: being strong and forceful (but not overbearing). This is in between the bookends of aggressive and passive. Opposite: timid.

5. Astute: keen ability to accurately assess a situation or person and turn it into an advantage. Opposite: unintelligent.

6. Cheerful: noticeably happy and optimistic. Simply smile while you present. Opposite: dreary.

7. Clear: easy to perceive, leaving no doubt. Attain clarity by testing your message beforehand. Opposite: vague.

8. Commanding: being authoritative. You should own the room, while enabling your audience to freely participate. Opposite: withdrawn.

9. Confident: being self-assured; a quality that is catchy. Opposite: uncertain.

10. Credible: convincing and believable. That seems inherently obvious. Opposite: unconvincing.

11. Dynamic: stimulating. Make your audience think; it’s one way to garner participation. Opposite: halfhearted.

12. Effective: successful in producing the desired result. Ultimately, this is what your presentation is all about. Ensure your audience gets what they expect and want. Opposite: ineffective or weak.

13. Energetic: demonstrating vitality. Pace yourself as you move about the room. Opposite: lifeless.

14. Engaging: attracting and occupying interest. Another key quality: connect individually with both large and small audiences. Opposite: unappealing.

15. Engrossing: absorbing all attention. Keep all eyes up on you, and not down on mobile devices. Opposite: boring, which is the kiss of death for any presentation.

16. Enthusiastic: showing intense and eager enjoyment. Opposite: depressed.

17. Focused: paying particular attention to the topic at hand. Keep on point; don’t allow your audience to take control. Opposite: flighty.

18. Innovative: original and creative thinking. Give your audience more than what they expect. Opposite: hackneyed.

19. Knowledgeable: intelligent and well-informed. Know a concept well enough to explain it to the uninitiated. Opposite: uninformed.

20. Logical: clear, sound reasoning. What you present must make immediate sense. Opposite: illogical or irrational.

21. Memorable: easily remembered; worth remembering. Make sure your audience takes something away with them. Opposite: forgettable.

22. Natural: smooth and polished. All this takes is a bit of concentrated practice. Opposite: self-conscience or awkward.

23. Organized: structured and in control. Respect your audience by taking the time to adequately prepare. Opposite: disorganized or inefficient.

24. Passionate: showing strong feelings. If you are not passionate, how can you expect your audience to follow suit? Opposite: apathetic.

25. Poised: graceful and elegant. This is the quality that encompasses many of the others. All the synonyms apply here: self-assured, composed, dignified, in complete control. Opposite: clumsy.

26. Present: fully aware and engaged in the current situation. Focus on what’s happening, as it happens. Opposite: distracted.

27. Relaxed: being comfortable (not tense or anxious). Set a calm tone for your presentation. Opposite: uptight.

28. Understandable: easily understood—by your audience, which is the critical part. Opposite: incomprehensible.

So there they are. Twenty-eight qualities to embrace and embody; twenty-eight to eschew. Now it’s up to you. All it takes is practice and performance to master these skills.

—Rich Maggiani

“Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine.”

One of the most famous and memorable lines in all of movie history wasn’t written by the script writers—it was created on the spot by Humphrey Bogart while filming one of the many lightening-rod scenes in Casablanca. Not only is Casablanca considered the best movie of all time by most film critics, but its script is also considered the best of all time by the Script Writers Guild. Even with those sterling achievements, Bogart’s ‘editing’ of that crucial line improved the dialogue and the film. As a result, the line endures 70 years after Bogart uttered it.

This is the value that an editor enmeshed with the writers can bring to improve written text.

Self-editing as a choice. More than likely, neither the documents you write, nor the ones I write, will carry the same longevity of Casablanca’s script. Nonetheless, your writing is important. And yet, many of us—myself included—often self-edit and eschew the brilliance that an editor can bring to our writing.

Make no mistake, self-editing often is a useful way to improve your writing. Letting text you’ve labored over to rest for a few days enables you to see that text from a new and expanded angle when you return to it. There’s a renewed clarity after your subconscious has stewed, which allows you to improve and build upon your initial text. In general, though, you are still bringing the same mind-set to your text, using the same base of information and perspective that you brought at the beginning.

An editor’s job. An editor, on the other hand, doesn’t need a few days to stew on your text. An editor sees your text for the first time, with its inherent novelty and sense of discovery. As such, an editor brings a different perspective and mind-set to your work, a certain clarity. But, and I must emphasize this, your editor must work within your paradigm while looking at your text from that outside perspective. You, as the writer, maintain final say over your text.

Your editor’s job is to improve your writing while fixing contextual errors, helping you communicate more clearly with your audience, helping you attain your goals—all while maintaining your original voice and style.

The value of an editor. An editor acts as the ‘first reader’ of your document, advocating for clear language, for you the writer, and for your readers:

Get to the point. The first question an editor wants an answer to is simply this: what’s the point? An editor makes sure your point is well stated, consistent throughout, and that all your text supports that point. Everything else is superfluous, and thus—gone.

Bring clarity to your message so that your audience readily understands what you are trying to say. For example, a writer can be too familiar with a topic and speak over the heads of their readers. An editor can come from that reader’s perspective, ask and answer the kinds of questions your readers might have, and alter your text in ways to make it more easily understood.

Tighten your text to improve its readability and its comprehension. Stephen King, the prolific mystery writer, states in his enlightening book, On Writing, that he reduces the size of his final draft by at least ten percent. He admits that he used to be tempted to add more to his final draft, but he quickly learned that this was counterproductive. No matter how difficult it is to cut what he considers to be some of his more prosaic phrases, he mercilessly cuts them because he knows his writing is not for him—it’s for his readers.

Sharpen your message so that your reader fully understands what you want them to do as a result of reading your text, and then responds as you intended. When writing a report, study, or plan, your editor can help ensure the document is on topic and its conclusion and recommendations will be readily accepted and adhered to. When writing a proposal, an editor can help ensure your prospect will accept your pitch and buy.

All of this ensures that your writing is reader-focused. Too many professionals write from their own perspective. This is only natural, since your perspective is what you know. For your writing to be most effective, however, it must be from the reader’s perspective: what do they need to know, how do they need to read it to get it, how is this information important to them (why should they keep reading), and how should they respond or act (the “what’s in it for me” perspective). An editor, with an outside perspective, is often better poised to attain this reader-centered perspective.

Your collaborator. Good editors do not consider themselves adjunct to the writing process nor to the writer. Instead, a good editor acts as your collaborator, working closely with you to instill clarity and cohesion in your work.

Ultimately, your editor works toward integrating humanity into your writing.

—Rich Maggiani

“Where are we going?”

My teenage son and I sat in the car in our driveway. He was behind the wheel, beginning another training session as he learns to drive. No engine started yet, when he posed that question. I just looked at him quizzically.

“You’re kidding, right?”

“No”, he said. “I don’t know where we’re going.”

I sat in silence for a bit, absorbing that. Okay, I thought, let’s start somewhere else.

“What are we trying to do?” I tried.

“Buy sneakers for me.” That’s good, at least he knew that.

“And where might we get those?”

“I don’t know.” The standard teenage response. Then he thought for a second. “How about the outlet mall? There’s a couple of stores there.”

“Let’s go then”, I said.

He started the car, and rolled a short distance, then stopped. He just sat there staring straight ahead. He looked deep in thought, pondering. I looked at him again, wondering.

He slowly turned to look at me, and with a look of chagrin said, “How do I get there?”

I laughingly smiled.

“You don’t know how to get there?” I asked with some incredulity.

“No”, he stated matter-of-factly. “How would I know that? I’m used to just sitting there and going along for the ride.”

Let’s pause the story there, and shift gears from driving to presentations.

How many presentations have you attended where it’s clear that the presenter doesn’t know where they are going? That the objective wasn’t clear, or even evident? Yes, there was a title that gave some idea of the topic, but the presenter just meandered along presenting various concepts and then just ended without any future direction or point. Been there? I have.

Whenever you give a presentation, you must know where you are going, where you are taking your audience. In other words: your objective. So here’s a quick primer on how to decide on your objective.

First, what is an objective? Your objective is what you want to attain as a result of your presentation. All presentations must have an objective, which essentially informs your audience why they are there, what they can expect, and how much they need to tune in.

An objective must state what you want to attain during your presentation, but it must also demonstrate benefits to your audience. To meet your objective, state explicitly what you want your audience to do.

Three perspectives. You can determine the objective of your presentation in one of three ways: from your perspective; from your audience’s perspective; or from a combination of both.

To develop an objective from your perspective, answer these four questions:

• Why are you presenting? List the reasons that you are giving this presentation to this audience.
• What are you presenting? Briefly outline the main points or content of your presentation. Identify benefits that meet your audience’s explicit needs.
• What do you want your audience to do? Put another way, what is your desired result? Determine what you want your audience to do, what
  action would you like them to take. In your closing, state this call to action and motivate them to act.
• Are you going to inform, instruct, or persuade your audience to act? Generally, you would use a combination of all three of these. Identify, at a high level, what you are informing, how you are instructing, and how you are persuading.

To determine your objective from your audience’s perspective, look at your presentation with your audience’s eyes and mind. Then answer these four questions:

• What is this about?
• Why should I listen?
• What am I asked to do, and why?
• What’s in it for me?

Communicate your objective to your audience. Communicate your objective using three basic methods: informing, instructing, and persuading. Since most presentations include all three:

Outline how you are going to inform them about the information you are presenting, your two to four points.

Instruct them on what you want them to do, to act on your call to action.

Persuade them to act on your call to action within a certain timeframe.

Now, back to our story. Another driving lesson a few weeks later: my son started the car and just sat there staring straight ahead. I waited patiently a bit, then looked at him.

“What’s the hold-up?” I asked.

Pause.

“Well,” he began. “I know where I’m going.” He turned and looked at me. Then continued, “I’m just trying to figure out the best way to get there.”

At that, I could only smile.

—Rich Maggiani

Audiences pay attention at the start of every presentation. They want to know the context and objective of your presentation and what they can get out of it—before they continue to listen. Even with a compelling reason to pay attention, they also want to determine if it is worthwhile to listen… to you.

You can determine when you have your audience’s attention simply by listening to their nonverbal clues—their body language: they are sitting upright, looking at you, alert, bright-eyed. Ever look around while presenting and see the tops of people’s heads? Their heads are not bowed in deference; they are fiddling with their cell phones. And not listening to you.

You must connect your audience from the very start, employing an engaging and memorable opening, and giving them a compelling reason to listen. An effective opening:

• Captures, and retains, your audience’s attention.
• States your objective and its benefit to your audience.
• Previews your call to action—what you want them to do when the presentation is over.

Consider using one of these techniques to open your next presentation with purpose.

A relevant story or anecdote. Audiences love stories. Telling a story or an anecdote that is directly related to your presentation, especially one that makes the point you are trying to make, can be especially powerful and motivating (no ‘war’ stories though). Tell your story so that your audience not only hears your words, but more importantly, can visualize the story and action. In my experience, opening with a story is far and away the best start you can make. It is, however, also the most difficult.

Metaphor or analogy. Metaphors as well as analogies allow your audience to see your point through a different lens—a lens that is familiar and readily understandable. A metaphor is a figure of speech in which a word or phrase is applied to an object or action to which it is not literally applicable (your presentation as a journey). An analogy, on the other hand, is a comparison between two things, typically for the purpose of explanation or clarification.

Metaphors open people’s minds to think differently, whereas analogies allow people to see concepts more clearly.

Provocative question. You can ask two types of provocative questions. The first, a rhetorical question, doesn’t require an out-loud answer; your audience answers it in their heads. A second, real question requires an answer even if the answer is a show of hands. Both types of questions must be easily answered by the majority of your audience and, of course, must apply directly to your topic.

Contemplative quote. A well-chosen quote gives your audience something to think about. That’s a good thing because a thinking audience pays attention. Consider a quote with a moral, especially when there is an obvious lesson and one that slowly unfolds as it sinks in; one that invokes that “ah-ha” moment. Also, a well-chosen quote that alludes to your objective can help compel your audience to act.

Startling statement or remarkable fact. Because you can impart a wealth of information, divulge information that makes your audience sit up and pay attention.

Surprising statistic. People love statistics. Offer a statistic that is designed to elicit an “I didn’t know that!” response from your audience, one that deepens their knowledge of your topic.

Bold promise. While this can be a dicey opening—you must be able to fulfill that promise, after all—it nonetheless impresses audiences to the point where they think to themselves: “Hmmm. I’d like to see that happen.”

Trend report. An insight into the future is always welcome. Be sure to use a trusted source based on valid research. Beware any pie-eyed prediction that might garner skepticism.

“Write this down for future reference…” Using this technique enables your audience to become immediately involved and engaged in your presentation. Try one of these examples: a short, pithy quote; a list of features and benefits of a product or service; the top five reasons for some subject. Be creative. Make sure it relates directly to your presentation, is worth writing down, and most especially is worth reading later.

Finally. Your opening is crucial to focusing your audience on your presentation. Make sure your opening, first, relates directly to the content and objective of your presentation and, second, comes from your audience’s point of view—stated in a way they can readily understand your topic and appreciate its benefit to them).

Prepare a tight opening, polish it to perfection, then practice it until you can deliver it flawlessly. After you have secured your audience’s attention, you can smoothly transition into the heart of your presentation.

To succinctly summarize: Start by grabbing them, then don’t let them go!

—Rich Maggiani

Because I enjoy telling stories, especially in business situations, my first thought was to begin this treatise with a story about a poor method for opening a presentation so that you can learn how dreadful this kind of opening can be.

This opening, one that you probably see and hear far too often and most likely bores you to doze off, seems to pervade far too many presentations. But I figured you would be so bored reading about it that you would not even make it to the end of this first paragraph. Understandable.

Story. Instead, I’m going to start by telling you a story about one of the first times I ever gave a presentation, and how I quickly learned how to start with an engaging opening.

The day before, I was practicing my presentation in front of a valued colleague, Philip. So I started:

“Good evening. Thank you all for coming here tonight. It’s so good to see all of you. I’m excited to speak to you about…”

“Stop!” Philip exclaimed.

I stopped. And looked at him. “What?”

“Rich, that is just about the most boring way to start. Everybody is so used to hearing that crap, that they immediately stop listening.”

“But,” I protested. “I want to welcome them.”

Philip frowned. “And fall asleep,” he continued

“And thank them,” I feebly added.

“Forget that crap. You want people to listen from the moment you open your mouth, to be on the edge of their seats, to hang on your every word.”

I smirked. “This is a business meeting. I’m supposed to tell them how they can communicate better with their prospects and customers. That’s got to inherently be a bit tedious.”

We just looked at each other a bit, Philip with that you-just-don’t-get-it look on his face.

“Hang on my every word,” I said a bit sarcastically. “Right.”

Philip continued to stare at me. There was that momentary stillness between us where time seemed to suspend. Somewhere in that stillness, I capitulated.

“Okay,” I said with some resignation. “What do I do then?”

He paused for effect.

“Tell them a story,” he said quietly.

A confused look crossed my face.

“A story?”

“Yes. A story,” he reiterated.

“A story!” I said again, incredulously.

“People love stories,” Philip continued. “Tell them a story about communicating with customers, about marketing to prospects. Something with a beginning, middle, and end. A story with substance, purpose, and meaning. Something with an edge, a conflict that gets resolved in the end. A story with a moral… or a lesson.”

“A story,” I said warming to the idea.

“Sure. People identify with stories in many different ways. They can be entertained by your story, and relate your story to their own experiences. Hopefully, they’ll get some greater insight as a result, something that resonates with them. That is what they will remember. Stories can be incredibly powerful.”

I thought about that for a moment.

“If you tell them a story,” Philip added, “even if they can’t relate your story to their own experiences, they will at least be able to empathize with your story, and by association, with you. They will be carried by the story, because if it’s captivating, they will pay attention until the very last word. They will want to know the resolution, how it worked out.”

I smiled at him. I liked this idea. In my mind’s eye, I saw myself telling the story, engaging the audience, looking them in the eye, watching their reactions, getting into the flow. Emoting. I knew just the story I would tell too. I could just picture the entire interaction.

As if on queue, Philip continued.

“Plus, when you tell a story, people visualize it. They see it in their mind. They not only hear the words, but those words paint a picture in their mind. And you know as well as I that being able to visualize something is paramount to understanding, to remembering, to… well, getting it,” he finished triumphantly.

The presentation. The presentation came. To dispense with formalities, the business group’s director introduced me.

I immediately launched into my story. No pleasantries, no thank yous, no welcomes; just story. And I watched their faces. Many looked surprised.

I moved across the front, first one side then the other. I walked down the aisle. I made points by looking various people in the eyes. I even threw in humorous epithets to describe a couple of the story’s characters. At the end, there were many questions: some about the topic, others about people’s experiences, and some about my story. Clearly, the story resonated with them.

There are many reasons to tell a story when you present. Presentations are all about your audience, and stories engage your audience. Besides, engaging stories move you toward humanity.

—Rich Maggiani

The best communication focuses on your audience. This is especially true when giving presentations. Too often, speakers are temped to call attention to themselves, thinking—erroneously—that they are the star of the show. Other times (although far less often), the focus is on the slides. While both are important components of presentations, they nonetheless must take a back seat to the needs of your audience.

Bottom line: you must discover what your audience wants and needs, then deliver it to them on their terms.

Let’s look at this from a different perspective. Consider the last time you spoke to a preschooler. Chances are you crouched down on one knee to bring yourself eye to eye with the tyke. You might have gently touched the child’s arm to establish a connection. You used the child’s lexicon, choosing your words carefully. You spoke slowly and enunciated clearly. All this to ensure that the child—your audience—would readily understand. In other words, you communicated on their level, focusing the conversation on their needs.

Follow this example when presenting. Focus on the needs of your audience.

Making your audience paramount is the most difficult aspect of your presentation. Your audience is not completely under your control, whereas you, the speaker, and your materials are. A little planning together with some hard work, however, eases the path. Here are some ways to better understand your audience, discover their needs, and connect with them during your presentation.

Do your homework. Invest some time to learn about your audience. Find out where they work and what they do. At the very minimum, find out what they expect to get out of your presentation; in other words, what are they going to do with the information you impart to them. When you know that, you can directly address that during your presentation. Discover what they already know about the topic, and perhaps how you can tap into that knowledge.

Talk to organizers to see what they know about the audience. Better yet, go right to the source and interview prospective audience members. Try to talk to the implicit leaders, people who probably have a better read on the problems your audience faces.

One other major factor: size. How many people do you expect to attend? Will you have a small intimate gathering or a large amorphous group? This number can affect how you engage your audience during your presentation.

Meet your audience. Arrive early before anyone else. As people enter, introduce yourself to them—even introduce them to each other—and get them talking. Ask questions; listen to the answers, and move the conversation along those lines. Breaking down some barriers at this point is easy since there are always early arrivals; the setting, informal and quieter. You can be more personable and less formal. Get to know who they are, why they are attending, and what they expect.

I especially enjoy this part. At the beginning, the room is relatively empty so there is a loose atmosphere in the air. I find that during these more personal exchanges, you become human to your audience. You become, at some level, one of them. I also take this opportunity to meet some people with whom I can establish an immediate rapport, for these are the people that I will focus on at the beginning of my presentation. This gives me some grounding, a deeper connection that the audience appreciates, and it helps me move quickly into being completely audience-centered while I present.

Connect with your audience. Speak to people individually by looking them in the eye for a few seconds; start with those people you met earlier, then move on to others. Move into the audience if you can; this breaks down barriers. Gesture and use facial expressions to emphasize what you say. Be energetic and enthusiastic. Refer to individuals by name. Speak conversationally. Employ the verbal techniques of projection, pitch, pronunciation, pace, and pausing. Get into it—reveal your personality.

I know when I’ve reached this point because I feel a flow to my movements and words; I feel intertwined with my audience by establishing this deeper connection that it brings everyone together. It raises the communication to another level to the point where the entire audience is imbedded in that same flow. While this might sound silly, there have been presentations where, together, the audience and I have attained a certain nirvana, where everyone is engaged, and everything flows as one. As a presenter, I find this incredibly gratifying for both myself and, more importantly, for my audience. Knowing that my audience has been engaged and connected, that they have learned and been enlightened, that they can move on in their professional lives with more information, that they are changed in many positive ways and their work has been enhanced, well…

That is your goal.

—Rich Maggiani

Anyone who has watched a teenager take driver’s ed can empathize—even if that teen isn’t your own. The angst, the “omg, not my car!”. That’s one of the beauties of driver’s ed: the teen learns on someone else’s car. As is my teen. Yesterday, when he came home from school, I was pleased that was the case.

“How was school?” I asked.

“Good.” (Don’t you just love those informative one-word answers?)

“How was driver’s ed?” I persisted.

Pause. Then finally, “It was okay.”

The story. Now, as any parent worth their salt knows, when there is a pause, there is trouble.

“What happened?” I asked matter-of-factly, cutting right to the core.

My son just looked at me with wary eyes. I could see that he was measuring his words in his mind, struggling to decide just what to say.

“The car broke down.” He ventured in a slightly hesitating voice.

Now I knew immediately that this was just the title of the story, that there was much more to hear. The question remained though: could I coax that story out of him? Worth a try. I had a feeling this was going to be good.

“The car broke down.” I reiterated.

He looked askance at me. “Yeah.”

“That’s it?”

“Well, not exactly.” He said, his voice trailing off a bit. “What is there to eat?”

Nice try, but diversion will not work.

“Let’s keep to one topic at a time,” I said. “Tell me about the car breaking down.”

“Well,” he intoned in that well-practiced, exasperated, annoyed voice that teenagers perfect early in their ten-year journey toward their twenties. “What do you want to know?”

I know that tone. It might have worked a few years ago in putting me off the chase for the truth, but I was long over that. So I forged on.

“What do you mean, ‘the car broke down?’”

He pursed his lips. “The car stopped running…” he began, paused a couple of seconds, then continued. “After it kinda got into a little accident.”

Whoa. I didn’t expect that. I was a little unnerved. He was in a car with inexperienced drivers, after all. Perhaps I should worry more.

“What do you mean, ‘kinda?’”

Again, the hesitation.

“Torin. Are you all right?”

“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine. And so is everyone else.” He stated flatly.

“Then what do you mean by ‘kinda got into an accident?’”

He took in a deep breath. Then it all came out rather quickly.

“The car went over a curb at a corner, kinda hit a lamp post a little bit, scraped a lot on the bottom, then bounced back into the road.” Pause. “Then the engine died.” Another pause. “Just like that.”

I was speechless. And stunned. I tried to envision what had happened, then thought of the students and the instructor, and the driver. Then it hit me.

I looked at him. In my most understanding voice, asked, “Who was driving?”

Right away, I knew I had hit on a sensitive spot. He gazed at me with baleful, slightly watered eyes.

“Me.”

I felt all the air go out of me. I just looked around helplessly. Finally, I sat down on the counter stool. I started to pull myself together.

“Then what happened?”

“You know,” he said, emboldened a bit now that the hard part was over. “Driver’s ed teachers don’t know diddly about cars. I mean, after I couldn’t restart the car, I popped the hood. He got out of the car, looked under the hood, and just stared at the engine like it was alien. He yanked a couple of wires, but clearly, he didn’t know a thing about it. Finally, he took out his cell phone, called his office, and next thing you know, a wrecker showed up. The mechanic got the car running in about two seconds. Ridiculous.”

“So, everyone is all right?”

“Yes.” That exasperated voice again.

“And the car is all right?”

“Hmmm. Not too sure about that.”

“And the driver’s ed teacher?”

The enlightenment. “You know, he’s a good driving teacher, but he knows nothin about cars. He can drive them, but doesn’t know how they work. The mechanic, now he knows how cars work, but I’m sure he can’t teach a bunch of high school kids how to drive one. Don’t you think that’s ironic?

“Yes, I see that.” I said. Because I really did see it. We’ve all said that phrase: “Yes, I see that.” Immediately after someone has explained something to us, and we understand. We see it, even though the explanation was verbal. Seems a little out of context, but, actually, it is not. We understand because we can visualize it, “see” it in our mind’s eye. Stories do that—they enable you to visualize. As such, they are a great way to communicate information. Makes me wonder about how poorly all those bullet-point slide presentations communicate when stories are far more effective.

—Rich Maggiani